Lost or Gained

There were conflicts fought all over the world from 1930’s to 1940’s, and my country was in war too. The Japanese War was between the Republic of China and the Empire of Japan. It had proceeded in China for eight years. The Japanese army carried a rule which is known as the Three All Policy-“Kill All”, “Burn All” and “Loot All”. It created major losses for China which slowed down the country’s development. Beside, the Japanese War not only changed China, but also changed my family. The war affected my family in various ways. My family’s history had changed due to some events that happened to my ancestors.

First, the war altered my family’s economic status. My great-grandparents had a restaurant before the war started. They were not very wealthy, but there was enough income to support the family. However, the arrival of Japanese army ruined everything. Japanese soldiers robbed the restaurant, and they burnt it down. Luckily, my family managed to escape and survive. After that, they lost all their property, so they lived their lives painfully. My great-grandparents had to work for rich people to earn money even though the salary was low. My family was too poor to feed everyone. Moreover, my grandpa and his siblings were reduced to begging or starving, and everyone struggled for their lives.

In addition, some family members died during the war. Although people were being killed throughout the war, my family was not included. However, they did not have enough food or clothes for everyone. They were not in a good health because life was full of fear. The Japanese army was so bloody; people worried about their safety and lived in constant fear. Japanese soldiers killed every Chinese they met irrespective of gender and age. Terrible Japanese soldiers followed the Three All Policy strictly, so millions of Chinese died in the Japanese war. My ancestors were fortune enough to escape the killings. My grandpa was the youngest child. His elder brothers and sisters were very kind, so they gave their little brother the food they got from begging instead of eating it themselves. That is why my grandpa survived, but his siblings did not make it. It was a pity to the family. If this hadn’t happened, there would have been many more members in my family.

Most of all, the war changed my grandpa’s view of life, and it made him succeed in his life. The family had four more children later on, so my grandpa became the eldest brother. Since he lived through and survived the war, he had seen so many things of the cruel world. He felt that he had a responsibility for the family, and he wanted to protect his country. It was his ambition for the future. Therefore, he joined the army when he was old enough. Fortunately, he did a good job when he served the military. As a result, he got a promotion from his leader. He solved many difficult cases when he was working in a police station, and he became a police chief after years. Furthermore, everybody in town knows him, for he was an admirable police officer.

The development and history of China would be utterly different if the Japanese War never happened, the same to my family. The war took away some things from my family, yet I think it also gave them some opportunities. The misery let them have the desire to conquer, and they did it. My grandpa’s experience taught me a lesson - adversity is advantageous to one’s growth. It just depends on how you deal with it. Adverse circumstances are like a spring. The more power you put to press it, the further it goes down. It is easy to be dispirited when we are facing difficulties. On the other hand, difficulties can make people have the invincible will to overcome misery. Success or failure is in the control of our hands.

Found the Boy

Mma Ramotswe found a boy in the witch doctor’s house. The witch doctor was a skinny and tall man. Mma knew who the boy was and asked the skinny man to let the boy go. He smiled and said that Mma Ramotswe could take the boy with her if the boy wants to go with her. There was a slender scar on the boy’s forehead. Mma asked the boy whether he is the son of the teacher at Katsana Village, yet he said she was crazy.

The boy turned to the witch doctor asked him: “Who is this fat crazy lady, father?” Mma was shocked. It seemed like the boy had lost his memory; it must be the scar on his forehead. The tall man laughed and said: “It must be the damn sun outside that made this lady had some illusion. Go to make her some tea, my son.”

After the boy walked inside the kitchen, Mma Ramotswe said angrily: “How dare you do this to an innocent boy? You are smart. He will do whatever you, his father asks him to do.” The man laughed out loud: “Mma, this is not your business. I’d like to ask you to leave. Save your time.” Mma Ramotswe replied: “I will take him with me later on. Watch me!” Then, she walked out and shut the door. She got in her tiny van and started the engine.

After an overnight drive, she arrived at the front of the school at Katsana Village. Meanwhile, a man with glasses stepped out the building. He said to Mma Ramotswe: “May I help you, Mma?” “Are you the father of Thobiso, Rra? I’m Mma Ramotswe.”She said. The man stood still for a moment. “Yes, I am. Did you find my son?” “I did, and I can take you to your son.” “Thank God. Where is my son, Mma?” “I can say that he is safe now. I have driven all night. Can I have some rest at your place before we go? I want you to find some photos of your family and take them with us to your son.” “Sure. Let’s go.”

Mma Ramotswe was wiped out after two long driving. She took a shower and slept for a whole day.

The next day, they began their journey in the early morning. They were at their destination before sunset. Mma Ramotswe said to the teacher: “Here we are. Come with me, Rra.” She opened the door and they walked into the house.

The witch doctor and a woman who must be his wife were sitting around the table with the boy; they were having supper. “My son, I found you finally.” The teacher cried out and moved forward to hug his boy. “Who are you, Rra? I don’t know you.” Thobiso pushed him away. The woman spoke up: “Rra, what are you talking about? This is my son. Please leave us alone.” She held Thobiso tightly as if he will disappear suddenly.

The teacher was shocked and turned to Mma Ramotswe for an answer. “This is why I asked you to bring photos. Now, take them out.” The witch doctor looked scared. He stood up and tried to take those photos before the teacher handed them to the boy. He shouted: “Don’t!” The photos dropped on the floor. Thobiso saw that was him in those photos. His memory flashed in his mind. He ran into the teacher and cried.

The woman fell on the floor and whispered: “Where is my son? Where……”

The witch doctor sobbed and said: “It was my fault. I was too greedy. One year ago, there were many customers that came to me for witchcraft. I couldn’t find enough children. I killed my own son that time because I had made deals with all the people who came to me. My wife was out of gear after she found out. She missed our son so much and cried all the time. So, I decided to bring back a son for her. You and my son look so alike. That’s why I took you. However, you are not my son. He is dead.”

Mma Ramotswe said: “You shouldn’t have done this to your son or any other children. People all have parents. I hope you quit practicing witchcraft from now on. I know someone who works in a police station. I don’t think you want me to bring them here too.” “I regret what I did already. I can promise you. You may go now.”

Mma opened the door. The three people got in the van and drove away.

The Door to Better Life

As Mao Zedong announced that the People’s Republic of China was founded, the door to a new life for Chinese people was open. After we won the Chinese Civil War, the People’s Republic of China was founded on October 1^st, 1949. That was an exciting moment that every Chinese person feels. Last Thursday is our country’s sixtieth birthday, our mother’s birthday. Unfortunately, I couldn’t spend this emotional moment with my family. When I was young, I always heard my grandma talk about how grateful she was to the government for bringing them from farmers to citizens. My grandparents began their new life with the help of the People’s Republic of China, so their offspring could live happily and healthily.

When the door to better life opened, the government gave a key to my grandparents. The government offered a lot of benefits to farmers. In the old days, farmers were very poor. They didn’t have enough food, and they even didn’t have a warm place to spend winter. The government wanted to improve the quality of life of farmers. They allowed farmers to move to cities, and they allocated people land and houses. My grandparents moved to the city of Shenyang where they have lived their entire lifetime. My mother and her sisters were born there. Due to the government’s policy, my mother’s family had a comfortable life. My mother and her sisters could go to school, and they could have a pleasant childhood.

The government also offered people chances for improving their knowledge. My grandparents learned how to read and write with the help of the government. When my grandparents arrived Shenyang, it was difficult to do anything because they never went to school or were educated before. It was very common among farmers to be uneducated. Most of them didn’t think education was necessary. They just knew they must work hard every day to support their family. Furthermore, they didn’t have money to go to schools, and there were few schools at that period because of the Chinese Civil War. Japanese enemies wanted to invade and occupy China. I watched a lot of movies about this war. Japanese enemies were like monsters. They killed people and destroyed hospitals and schools. People were scared to go outside. It was hard at the beginning for my grandparents after they moved to city. The government considered this problem of farmers, so they offered free classes for the people who didn’t know how to read or write. My grandparents went to the open classes, and they worked hard and mastered the basic reading and writing skills which was very helpful for finding a good job.

The founding of the People’s Republic of China not only improved people’s life status, but also improved women’s status in society. The government promulgated many new laws that were good for women. In the old society, women were in the lowest status that they couldn’t rebel against men. They were badly treated, especially the women who gave birth to girls. Women had no right to speak, and there were no jobs offered to women. Furthermore, women had to stay at home to do housework and to look after the children. Since the new country was born, women also received their new life. My grandmother got a job in a store. She said the job changed her old mind that women were useless, and it made her feel confident.

Since the People’s Republic of China was founded, our country has become more and more prosperous. My grandparents received their new life, and they worked hard all their lives, so their family could have a happy and comfortable life. The People’s Republic of China opened the door to better life for many Chinese people. Under its leadership, our country will be stronger and stronger, and people will receive their success soon.

Happy Ending of The NO.1 Ladies' Detective Agency

After Mma Ramotswe brought the boy back to his parents, she felt relaxed because what she worried about was solved. Mma Ramotswe told her secretary, Mma Makutsi that she would close her office early today, and she invited Mma Ramotswe to have dinner with her. Mma Makutsi was surprised that her boss asked her for dinner.

“Mma, is there any good news to you?”

Mma Ramotswe smiled, “Because I want to relax myself today. I always feel very tired after I finish one case, but today I feel differently. I understand how happy to help people and how important my job is. I want to make a holiday for celebration.” Mma Makutsi was full of doubts.

“Sorry, I can’t tell you anything. I feel happy because I saved a boy, and I saved his whole life. I have never felt so successful to set up this detective agency.” Mma Ramotswe thought.

They went to the restaurant which Mr. J.L.B. introduced to her. This restaurant was really a nice and quite place for dinner. Mma Ramotswe and Mma Makutsi had a lot of fun. They had a vey happy and long chat. After the dinner, Mma Ramotswe wanted to drive Mma Makutsi back home, but Mma Makutsi said her husband would come to pick her up. They stayed there to wait Mma Makutsi’s husband. A few minutes later, her husband arrived. Mma Makutsi was very happy to see her husband. Her husband wasn’t handsome, but he seemed very nice to Mma Makutsi. Mma Ramotswe realized how wonderful that was protected by someone. She also wanted someone that was nice to her and picked her up every day.

After saying goodbye to Mma Makutsi and her husband, Mma Ramotswe drove her little white van to her father’s house. She still kept that house after her father died. There was a photo of her father on the middle of the wall. Mma Ramotswe walked to the picture.

“Dear father, I used to think that I would never get married again. I thought I would be alone my whole life, but today I realized that I was just afraid of having a new marriage. I also want someone that can take care of me, and there is a man that is very nice to me. I want to get marry with him now. Father, I hope you will bless me.”

Mma Ramotswe kissed her father’s photo, and then she left. Mma Ramotswe went to Mr. J.L.B. Matekoni’s garage directly.

Mr. J.L.B. was surprised that Mma Ramotswe visited him at this time. He thought she was here for repairing her car. Mma Ramotswe held his hands, and asked, “Would you marry me?” Everybody was shocked. After a while, Mr. J.L.B. laughed happily. “Of course, I’d love to. That is my dream.” Everybody else applauded for them. Mma Ramotswe and Mr. J.L.B. embraced each other.

Experience in the United States

Coming to another country has been a hard experience for me. After I entered the United States, everything was different and difficult for me. My father told me that students with good academic preparation from high school are more likely to graduate from college. I was so happy when I found out that they provide all those things for students because in my country, I had to provide everything for myself. Everything from textbooks to supporting students was difficult. Instructional material, academic background of the teachers, and my attitudes toward education in Malcolm College.

First, education in the United States was basically different in terms of instructional material for the students. When I started school at Malcolm College, I found out that education was the same goals in Liberia. However, the difference was the way academic material was imparted to me. At last I got to know that education in the United States is fully equipped with instructional materials. American schools have up to date laboratories, computers, and other learning material available. Furthermore, I experienced that the faculty and the instructional material in the United States was more advanced. When I was doing G.E.D at Malcolm x college, I had a painful experience. I did not have financial aid to pay for my books. So I was responsible to get then on my owned. I was not working by that time, so it was hard for me to get the textbooks.

Second, when I got to the United States I realized that the teachers in my country internet prepared for the job. When I took classes in Chicago, I had difficult. For example, English was very hard for me to understand the teachers. Writing and reading was also difficult for me. Most of the teachers in my country are not college graduates and they have no formal training for studying or knowing how to study, so I had a hard time studying at Malcolm College. Another difficultly with the teachers in the United States is that they have more experience, so they wanted me to know the entire lesson all at once time, but it was hard for me. That meat, the teacher wanted me to do all the work they give me and know how to read and answer questions from it the next class. Most of the high school teachers in the United States have at least undergraduate degrees and in most high schools, teachers have master’s degrees or better.

Even though my attitude toward the education in the United States was very good, I still had all this difficultly at Malcolm x college. Sometimes my attitude used to be poor because of the level of the instructors in the United States. I used to sit in class without answer question because of my English. Whenever I talked in class, they will say that they can’t understand what I am saying. However, I was still willing to learn under those tough conditions. After I spent one year at Malcolm College, my attitude became better because I had friends and they could understand me very well, and also I used to understand the teachers and talk in class.

Coming to another country was a painful experience for me because of the lack of necessary materials such as textbooks and computers back home. Although everything for school was up to date, I still had hard time in school. With all this, I am happy for learning the hard way because I got to know that it is better to learn the hard way than the easy way. Moreover, I will like to say that America schools have qualified teachers who are dedicated to making sure that they impart worthy knowledge to their entire student.

Taking the Good with the Bad

One of life's most difficult challenges is probably the lonesome process of adapting to a new culture. Still, research shows that the average number of immigrants that annually enter the United States is 800,000. Depending on whether you originally come from an eastern or western culture, the personal experiences of adjusting to the American culture do certainly vary. In my case, I claim that it was easier for me to give up German habits than for someone who didn't grow up in the western world, yet I still have had a hard time adapting to certain aspects of the American culture. Furthermore, I anticipate to only stay in this country as an Au Pair for a certain amount of time, which makes it even more difficult for me to renounce German culture in most instances and to live the real American way of life. Even though I fell in love with this country the very first day I got here I've had and I am still having trouble getting used to American food and the eating habits that come along with it.

One of the first things I noticed when I arrived in America was the great amount and variety of fast food establishments. The average American probably eats out at a fast food restaurant four to five times a week. I can definitely see the advantage of saving time and money, but nowadays people are just getting very lazy and are not cooking nutritious meals for their families anymore. Instead, those families are going out eating fatty and greasy food. Preparing fresh meals for dinner has become very rare and throughout the day you can expect to find tons of junk food in the kitchen. I once checked the list of ingredients on the back of a cereal box and shook my head in disbelief. Besides scary sounding miscellaneous I was shocked by how much sugar I am actually eating with just one bowl of this certain cereal every morning. It actually seems like that there is sugar in every kind of food in America. Considering the great quantities of food and the free-refill offers made at almost every restaurant, it is evident that America is the country with the biggest obesity problem in the world. However, the awareness that any kind of fast food is unhealthy and that a large consumption can quickly lead to overweight, does not seem to stop Americans from eating another cheeseburger at McDonald’s.

The habit of going to a fast food restaurant or ordering food in does certainly save time, but it makes eating healthy secondary. Since I was used to eating a lot of fresh food in Germany, I value taking time to prepare and eat fresh meals. Most Germans enjoy eating socially and making eating an experience for everyone joining them in their daily meals. In America, I have the impression that everybody is always too busy to eat. Many Americans are always in a rush and only manage to snack on food in between appointments. Moreover, it is also tough for me to get used to the fact that a warm meal is usually served for dinner. In Germany, we consider lunch to be the most important meal of the day, which is the reason why we rather have a warm meal for lunch than for dinner. Besides we believe that a good lunch gives one his/her necessary load of energy for the day, and that one rather skips dinner before he/she is going to have a large meal before nighttime.

Since I am living with an observant Jewish family, eating kosher became another aspect of my new life that took me quite a long time to adjust to. At first, it was hard for me to keep the rules of eating kosher in mind and also to remember not to use the wrong dishes or to make sure that they don't get mixed up in the kitchen. I once forgot that dairy products and meat must not be eaten together, and I fried a piece of chicken in butter in a dairy pan. Not only did we have to throw away the chicken, but we also had to get rid of the pan. That was the day I gave up cooking in a Jewish household.

Despite gaining weight, not being able to experience German eating habits anymore and sticking to the rules of eating kosher, I have never really had nor will I ever have a lot of difficulties of adapting the American way of life. Although I never expected to miss German food as much as I do, I don't regret my decision of coming to the U.S. because I feel very comfortable in my new environment. Especially as time passes by, I have the feeling that it becomes easier to accept the cultural changes.

Losing in a New Life

Education has been very important in shaping of my life. At the beginning, coming to YSA was endless happiness as the USA was an unknown culture and an amazing different world for me. At first, everything was interesting and I was willing to figure it out, but later on changing my habits became tough. I had a hard time experiencing the differences regarding my social life, teacher’s manners and financial issues.

Firstly, losing ability to socialize and almost becoming and asocial person in one of the greatest changes that I have experienced. In the beginning, I was isolated form other students who are native speakers because my English is not as good as a native speaker’s. When I was a DePaul student, native students generally do their activities with their native friends. Also, they don’t want international students to be a part of their group activities. It has made me feel uncomfortable. That does not mean most of the native born people behavior like that, but I have faced these kinds of problems a lot. Besides, I was expecting that every person would be helpful, kind, and friendly. My first day in the school, I was trying to explain myself with body language, and one of the guys who worked there said to me “ we do not understand you. Who can help us to translate what she wants to tell us?” I was surprised because they should have helped me. In addition, they considered me like a native girl in the school even though I was not able to speak fluently. Therefore, I lost my social personality a result of the language differences and communication problems.

Secondly, I lost my efficiency in the class because of the teacher’s manners. In Turkey, student and teacher communication is really amazing and closer than in the USA. Most teachers show interest in students one by one and they have effective contact not only with students, but also with families. In the United States, as far as I have experienced there is different relationship between teacher and student. It is pretty different for me because I did not have close relationship with teachers here like I had in Turkey. When I was learning English in my school, one of my teachers told me after we finished a quarter terms she said that my pronunciation was awful. That kind of behavior would most probably destroy a student’s desire and willingness to learn is why that teacher’s approach has serious significance in my educational life and decreasing my efficiency as a language learner.

Apart from this, being an international student in the USA is another issue that has a big impact on my life. In addition, I have lower living conditions. Since I am an international, and I have to pay threefold of a native student beside the other extra fees. When I paid my college fees, I was disappointed. Because I pay more tuition and other extra fees for the college, I have less money for rent and food. Another point is I cannot take advantage of native students ‘opportunities. For example, it is very hard to get admission with scholarship if you are not foreigner in this country. In addition is that you cannot work off campus, and working opportunities is very limited on campus.

In conclusion, people can get their life by education and as much as they effort, they will getting more. And by the wind of education desire, I have been in USA. While I was trying adapting to a new life, I had tough time. These reasons are diverseness in my social life, the teacher behavior and financial problems. All of these differences enforced me to adapt into new life.

Difficulties in one's culture

Cynthia Manu

ESL100

9 /15 / 09

Difficulties in one’s Culture

Cultural practices were as easy as counting one- two- three. There have been so many difficulties that I have encounter in my life. At the same time, I have had a hard time in practicing one’s culture. I was born in Ghana, and lived there for almost twenty-one years. I was aware of the culture, and was active in it. I went to high school, and then I graduated. However, because schools in my country are not too good, I was not able to go further. Due to the cost, higher education is very hard to get access to in my country. I now lived in United States, and I have been in this country for almost three years. I have witnessed so many difficulties in cultural practices since I got to America.

First, extended family is the number one custom in Ghana. Some cultures are so difficult that it makes me feel very uncomfortable. Especially, in my country, we were used to the extended family, which is a system that makes one feels very comfortable, in living in Ghana. Even though you cannot provide for yourself but the members in the family will provide. That custom makes sure that the rich people in the family take care of the poor. For example, one of my mother’s sisters, Auntie Doris has four kids, but she does not have money to take good care of them. Therefore, the family has to take care of them. On the other hand, my mother is taking two of them to school and caring for them. Nevertheless, in this country, the focus is only the nuclear family. Therefore, if your parents are less fortunate, that means the kids are also the same. Nevertheless, in my country, there is nothing like ‘homeless’, and in this country, you can see many people in their own country. A country, that is with milk and honey that everybody will like to come to, although people call themselves homeless.

Again, the types of food that I used to eat in my country are also different in America. In Ghana, I go with my parents by the customs of eating fufu, and soup with my fingers. My mother prepares fufu, and palm nut soup with bush meat and some dry fish. This makes the soup have a funny smell, and makes my American friends hesitate to eat it. Some of them just look at it, and say this food is nasty. We have some kinds of food that I cannot eat in public in this country. I can only eat them when I am in the house.

Furthermore, how to respect an elderly person was one of the major things in Ghana. For instance, my parents taught me how to approach an elderly person. For example, in my country, if I see an elderly person, I cannot call them by their names like Cynthia or Edward, rather, I have to say Mrs. Cynthia or Mr. Edward. By calling them by saying Mr., Mrs., Miss., Papa and Mama, otherwise they will say you are not a respectful child. As a result, I cannot stop calling people by saying Mr. or Mrs. However in this country; they used to tell me not to call them with any title it makes them feel too old. In Ghana, my parents also taught me that, if I see any body that is, older than I am, with heavy load, I have to offer help to it and carry it for that person. This means you are a respectful child. I used to have a hard time when I see an elderly person in this country with a heavy load, I want to help, and on the contrary, they may think I want to steal their things.

In conclusion, I have had so many difficulties in cultural practices in the United States. However, I have witnessed some cultural practices in my country and this country as well. In Ghana, I was okay with any cultural practices. In contrary when I got in this country, things have been tough for me. How to respect an elderly person was one of the major things in Ghana, but in this country is opposite way. They think it makes them feel too old. Sometimes I feel that I am insulting the elderly people that I come across by, calling them with their names. The way to approach an elderly people in America is quite different form others. I think American people have to teach their kids how to respect any body that is older than. At the sometime, the nuclear family is the focus in the United States. Because of these, it has lead to many squatters. These people called themselves as homeless. I think that, America should pass this extended family as law. Moreover, types of food that I used to eat are also different. Fufu and soup with meat are not eating by Americans. All the same am trying to coup with every thing in America.

The Day of the Dead

The Day of the Dead
The day of the Dead is like spirit for me and deep feeling that I miss every year. Every country has different celebrations and traditions on day of dead. Smoke, candles and some flowers in the cemetery are symbols of missing and remembrance. Here in America I have no family buried in the earth so I can’t observe this holiday. This holiday is connected to the land of my ancestors. I miss the ritual of going to the cemetery, the high mass and the family gathering after.
The first thing I miss about the day of the dad is the ritual of going to the cemetery to clean my grandfather’s grave. I would always go to the cemetery in the afternoon and prepare the grave for the big celebration at three p.m. Ha has a nice big black grant monument. There is a little picture of him so I can look at him while I clean. I rake the leaves, and I plant a small pine trees around his grave. I always like to arrange ten candles in the shape of a big heart. I light the candles, and say a prayer. This is something that I can’t do here because I don’t have any dead family here.
The second thing I miss is the big celebration at three p.m. The big celebration is a high mass at the cemetery. The priest gives mass for almost three hours with beautiful songs, and he blesses every grave. It is very beautiful time for me because my family is with me and I’m surrounded by the fresh flowers and very original candles. It is hard for me here because I Can’t be present in Poland with my family at this special time.
Another thing I miss so much it is going to my grandmother home after the mass. Every year my grandmother prepares a delicious dinner that I can remember for whole year. For the first course she makes a wild mushrooms soup in honor of my grandfather. This was his favorite soup. Next we have roast pheasant with potatoes and sweet cabbage. We eat and remember my grandfather. We look at old pictures and tell old stories. I have no history in America and I have a hole in my heart knowing that I can’t be present there.
The Day of the Dead isn’t celebrated in America. Here people celebrate Halloween. Kids and adults run around in costumes eating candy and celebrating. I love this tradition here, and I can be around people wearing some funny costume, but inside me is strong missing about my grandfather and rituals of The Day of the Dead. I like Halloween, but after this celebrating I feel empty spirit. It’s hard for me to find that energy that I had in my country.

Changing

A famous person once said, “two weeks can change a person in a new place”. I never believed that is true before, but when I was arrived in the U.S, I could definitely feel some changes in myself. I am a typical Chinese boy, and when I was young, I would only learn about Chinese culture or eat Chinese food. During my time in the U.S., some changes occurred to me, and I feel that I begin to adapt the American style life. Cars sandwichs computers and ipods have come into my life, and if I didn’t have them one day, I don’t know how my life would look like. As a result, my biggest change has been my lifestyle.
First of all, Chinese people lost their traditional life style in this new co untry. They are not able to live their traditional lifestyle anymore. Most just eat three times one day, and the time is also very important, it can not be too early or late. When we were hungry, we rather eat Chinese food, and that is usually be our first choice. For example, when I and my father were in China, we went to Mcdonald's, and my father never ate any food because he never interested in fast food. Nevertheless, after he has been in Chicago, he changes some habit in his food, and he tries to eat some fast food. Another big change is food shopping. When I was in China, I usually went to the supermarket to buy some fresh food for the day, but it was different in U.S. Sometimes I just eat fast food, when I get home, and go shopping once a week. Therefore, these things are real different compared to how they’ve been before.
Secondly, I began to know American way of studying. When I was in China, we usually talked about western education, and we just knew that it is a distinct style. The western education pays attention to communication more than eastern education, which is different from Chinese students and American students. For example, I could still remember first day I went to Harold Washington, teacher’s humor and attitude make me feel relax, and I even could not believe that person was called a teacher because I felt that person was more like our friend. When the teacher collected the homework from students, they usually said “thanks”. Therefore, I never felt scared of the teacher, and I really felt comfortable in class. In contrast, Chinese teachers used to show their degree to the student, which is the reason why teachers and students usually talk less in China.
A new environment really can change a person’s behavior and mind deeply. I have been in Chicago two years that I have learned a lot of useful knowledge from school, and some experience from the society. I insistently go to school every time and do a lot of homework, though I really dislike going to school. Because a famous Chinese professor once said, studying isn’t only in order to get more money, which is in order to advance yourself. I am so lucky that can go to college in U.S, and to meet a lot of different countries’ people. I restart to construct my dream road, and to depurate my soul. This is a fortunate chance can make me be success, and I should catch it tightly, don’t waste invaluable youth.
I never imagined my American life would be like it is right now. I drive my car everyday, go shopping less, and eat too much fast food. The environment really can change a person’s lifestyle, and it could be better or worse. To exist in a strange country that needs courage and purpose. On the other hand, because of a new environment which is can make you success or make you corrupt. The point is that do you really want be a respectful person or an insignificancy person?

Reciprocal Wedding

It is the most beautiful moment when a woman becomes a bride. Every little girl dreams about her ideal wedding ceremony. What will she look like? Where will the best place for her wedding be? How does she prepare? Everything has been done in her imagination. Nowadays, weddings have become less serious because people in the new century have to consider many issues to plan a wedding. For example, time and finance are the biggest problems. For those who have the time problem, the solution is to choose wedding trip which can save your time for the honeymoon. For the couples who have financial problems, they can make the beach wedding, which can save the rental for the dress and the place. As a result of the new wedding plans, many traditional customs have been replaced by these new concepts.

The wedding dress is one of the essential elements that cannot be supplanted. From the phoenix crown, which is the bridal veil to “Qipao”, the long fitting dress, Chinese tradition wedding clothes have been gradually taken over by the western wedding gown. Only a few people will wear “Qipao” for her wedding ceremony, which makes me feel upset. The Chinese people have an expression that says “When you are in a new place, do as they do at their countries.” I guess this is the reason why so many people like to wear the wedding gowns more than the “Qipao” because they want to seep into this new culture. Also, the western wedding dresses are more fashionable and have more styles for the bride to choose. As a Chinese woman, I think the “Qipao” can mostly present the beauty and verve of a Chinese woman, but I may never have a chance to wear it. I only saw my cousin wear it in her wedding. It is beautiful and attractive. In addition, the color used for the wedding dress is different from the typical U.S. dress. For example, white is the wedding gowns’ main color because it represents simplicity and purity. Unlike the color white, Chinese use the red color which has a significant meaning of happiness. You can see everything is dyed with the cheerful color.

Second, the procedures of the wedding ceremony have been lost in this new land. There are some rules you have to follow during the ceremony. Some of the superstitious elderly believe that before the wedding, the groom and the bride are not allowed to see each other the night before the wedding ceremony starts. If they do, bad luck will come to them, and their love will not be blessed. In the United States, many couples like to start their wedding in the church. However, in China, the groom and the bride have to meet their parents first and start their wedding in the groom’s house. The ritual of kneeling down is a necessary step in China. Firstly, these rituals mean to please the God that created them and second to thank the parents that have taken care of them for a long time. After the wedding, the groom and the bride have to take over this responsibility to take care of their husband and wife. Last but not least is to bow to their spouses and promises to respect each other forever. After all of these steps, the groom and the bride will give a cup of tea to their parents for the well-wishing to their relationship from their parents. I think, all of these steps are meaningful memories. They symbolize that your life has moved to another stage and that you are not a child any more.

Food is the thing I miss the most in this new place, and it plays another important role in the wedding. In the past, people were not that wealthy to have enough money to make their invitation cards for the relatives. Therefore, they made the cookies and bread to reveal there was going to be wedding party in their house. I like to eat all of those handmade cookies, but this old custom has been omitted in the western industrialized countries. Besides, the dinner after wedding is appreciably different. Chinese people like to invite all their relatives to their wedding dinner. The food they eating for the supper has to be named in the good meaning. For example, in Chinese, a coconut means to have thousands of offspring, lotus seeds stand for having more children, nine means forever and one means the only one.

Traditional customs will make us remember the roots of our country. No matter how the world was changed, customs will make us stay unique. To continue and keep our cultures for the next generation is the ultimate goal of mine. I wish I could design my wedding ceremony. When that day comes, I will put on the “Qipao” and enjoy my traditional Chinese wedding ceremony.